Friday, July 28, 2006
Swimming with the Fishies
It's cloudy outside, for the first time in what feels like forever but is really only a couple of weeks. I actually like it. It's cooler, and it's much easier to sleep in this weather.
Yesterday was a nice day, a relaxed day, one of those days I always wish I had but so rarely seem to capture. I spent the morning wasting time, as usual. I was feeling kind of lousy since Hayley gave me her cold and I haven't been sleeping properly lately. Something about the essential fan blowing on me all night is just not conducive to sleeping. It's too hot without it and too much like a tropical storm with it spinning and whirring for hours. I walked to her apartment and she put the new Peaches album on my now-extinct Zen player. The album is Peaches usual shock-rock electroclash, and I like most of the songs, but Hayley hates the whole thing. Go figure. Here's a sample of some of Peaches more intelligent lyrics:
I'd rather fuck who I want than kill who I'm told to
I'd rather fuck who I want than kill who I'm told to
Let's face it: we all want toosh
If I'm wrong impeach my bush
impeach my bush
impeach my bush
impeach my bush
impeach bush
impeach bush...
-from Fuck or Kill
I like that she's gone semi-political. There's definitely a brain under all that naughtiness. Of course the music's still repetitive as all-hell and she still has a one-track mind like no one else, but really that's part of her charm.
I told Hayley how exhausted and sick I was yesterday and she started being really nice and very sweet to me. This is not to say that she isn't like that normally, but I'm so careful to be strong around her and not show her any vulnerability that there haven't been a lot of times where she's had to take care of me. Usually it's the other way around. It was refreshing, and made me think that maybe I can get away with not being strong all the time.
We decided to bus to Stanley Park and go to the aquarium, which is probably one of my favourite places in the world. The fact that Hayley loves it too bodes extremely well. The otters and dolphins and seals and the HUGE stellar sea lion were all ridiculously adorable and amazing, and we went through the Amazon gallery to look at the sloths and the huge scary three-metre long endangered river fish. Hayley liked the big turtles and the scarlet ibis, these beautiful tropical red birds.
We went downstairs to the beluga gallery, which was almost completely empty due to the tedious dolphin show upstairs which needless to say, we skipped. The water was this absolutely impossible cerulean blue, and the belugas danced in it like great undulating clouds. The light coming through the glass was incredible -- rays of yellow and blue that lit up our hands and faces. Hayley dyed her hair last week from albino bunny white-blond to auburn brown, and it makes for amazing contrast against her eyes. She was so serenely beautiful there, in that peaceful place, her eyes as blue as the water and her skin so soft in the light. I wanted just to hold her and kiss that spot on her collarbone and tell her that she's beautiful. It was a truly zen moment, where I felt lucky, really, really lucky to have her in my life. Underneath the pain and sadness there is such a sweet and wonderful girl, and I cannot possibly help but love her.
After the aquarium we walked to English Bay and had burgers by the beach. We sat on a log for a while and talked, and Hayley had to admit that she liked it there, even though it was miles away both geographically and atmospherically from Wreck Beach, where she always goes to get naked and burn that pale pale skin of hers.
She had to go to work last night and since she's staying with her best friend tonight and with her parents the next night and then I'll be out of town I'm not going to see her again for another week. Then it will be Pride Week and good times will be had by all.
I miss her already.
But at least we left each other with a great day, and some beautiful moments.
-N
p.s. Attention: Dana and Korbin -- if you guys are around and available and would like to come to the Vancity for Vancouver Pride, I would love to meet you both. I might even have a place for you to stay, but of course you should hang out with me and ascertain that I'm not a psycho first. Leave a comment on here or send me an email.
