Wednesday, October 12, 2005
On a completely frivolous note, I thought I'd go ahead and tell you all about my entertaining Sunday night out.
There had been a lot of buzz on a certain semi-famous (in the Vancity, anyway) website about a girl-bar event being held at a certain semi-famous (in the Vancity, anyway) gay bar in the West End. I was supposed to go to this event with Sophie, but she bailed at the last minute and I was desperately sad because there was no way in hell I was going to go by myself, but I couldn't think of a single soul I could go with.
My train of thought about who I should invite went something like this:
1) The Bro - not old enough + utterly clueless + completely unaware that I like girls = bad idea.
2) P.R. - something of an ex-boyfriend + straight + male = bad idea.
3) Cait - in England = bad idea.
4) Dag - in Spain = bad idea.
5) Emma - never goes out + has a girlfriend = bad idea.
6) Revenue Canada Girl - utterly psychotic = bad idea.
Finally, out of something approaching desperation, I posted the following message on the aforementioned website: "Free love!! The neatest person to invite me to the club tomorrow night is my new best friend."
Within seconds, I got a response.
It was from Leigh, a girl I've talked to online for the past month or so. We've never met in person, although we message back and forth a lot and she's super-nice and a good listener. She told me she was going to the club with some other people from the site and that she would buy me a ticket (she refused to let me pay her back...something about not being able to sleep with me, I dunno). I was thrilled. We talked on the phone and made plans to meet up the following evening.
She picked me up in her beloved blue minivan with another girl, Laura (who turned out to be a bit of a bipolar disaster waiting to happen, but that's another story). We went to Leigh's place for drinks, had a few beers, and headed downtown for what was simultaneously the most exciting and scariest night out of my entire life.
The club was a dark, smoky, cave-like room, instantly overstimulating, and full of women of all descriptions. The air glowed green and the music was a lot of thumping house and frenetic beats. There was a hell of a lot of exposed skin. The girl at the door stamped my wrist with the word 'Flygirl' and a picture of angel wings. Fine. By. Me. I had never seen so many beautiful girls in one place, ever. Every stereotype I have ever heard about lesbians was simultaneously confirmed and shattered over the course of a few hours. Just one example: I told Leigh that I had debated wearing a skirt to the club, and finally decided that it was a bad idea. Then I asked her: Was it a bad idea? She said no, but that in a skirt I would attract completely a different brand of women....the super-boyish kind. Whoa. Note to self: never wear skirts to pick up girls.
It was crowded, and as in any crowded club, people had to touch you to get past. But unlike men, who tend to cop a feel in the least subtle way possible, women are both gentle and confident. They put their hands on your waist to slide past. They do things like flip the tag from your shirt around so it isn't showing. They smile and they can be coy and they are 150% intimidating.
I alternated between clinging to the wall, doing laps around the room just to fuel my insatiable desire for girl-watching, talking to people I ran into (friends from high school and a certain cute librarian), dancing when the music got good (which was rare), and drinking gin just for the liquid courage. Every couple of minutes I would see what I thought was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, and then I would turn around and see another one even more beautiful than the last. It was insane. I was way too intimidated to approach anyone, and other than a few smiles, no one tried to approach me. Next time I will go in my underwear, and I am only partly joking.
Leigh turned out to be really cool, and I think she'll make a great friend. More than anything now I could use a couple of really solid friends who understand where I'm coming from.
We stayed at the club until about 2:45, then went to get some pizza. The other girls we met from the site were a bit nutty and by this point they were also very, very drunk. They insisted on flirting with some Australian guys at the pizza place, mainly by telling them that we were lesbians and that we would let them watch. Yet another stereotype....Leigh and I just rolled our eyes. It was a bit distasteful, but on the whole they were not classy girls. Laura drove Leigh's car like a fucking maniac and we were lucky to make it home in one piece.
On the whole it was a successful evening, if slightly off-colour. Next time I will go dressed to the proverbial nines and armed with nerves of absolute steel.
Leigh called it my coming-out party.
Oh yeah, right, it was Thanksgiving. My brother bought a turkey at 3:30 am on Sunday night at the 24-hour convenience store. We ate it with the family and had my mom's spectacular pumpkin pie for dessert. I tried not to reflect too much this year, lest I make myself even more depressed, but I am really thankful for my family, my friends, and the fact that I live in one of the most accepting and tolerant cities in the world.
Most of all, I am grateful to finally be me, in all my joy and sorrow. This is the first year I can say with confidence that I am truly myself, and now I can try to be the best person I can be.
Nome, Version 2.0. Upgraded, and updated.