Tuesday, July 04, 2006
But I have to post one paragraph just to show you how startling similar Hayley and I can be:
"I'd like to be ten again, and have my summers consist of living in my bathing suit and barefeet, picking blackberries, random day adventures in suburbia, and playing hide and go seek in the dark. I wouldn't be thinking or worrying about any of this."
Remember this post?
"The blackberry blossoms are out now, and you wouldn't think that they smell like anything, but they do. They smell like being 11 years old and eating freezies on a dock while fishing for minnows. They smell like the last time I was ever really, really comfortable in my body, at 12 years old in a little pink bathing suit, all skinny limbs and long hair. They smell like summers in the country and lemonade stands and scraped knees. They smell like being young and free and happy, which I suppose I still am."
[A serious aside: I think she's a rather lovely writer]
I can't tempt fate anymore. I don't even believe in fate. I don't know what I believe in, I just know that everything I believe is terribly falliable. Love, determination, loyalty, and patience simply may not be enough to keep this girl I love with every fibre of my being.
How how how how how how how do I work this out? This is the biggest puzzle I have had to tackle in ages.
I welcome all and any suggestions. And at this point, please don't hesitate if you don't know me all that well, or aren't terribly well-versed in my situation. Any and all input would be most helpful and appreciated.